The Sex Questions Blog

Whenever I get a new idea for a tee shirt, I usually google it and see if some other genius came up with the same idea. Invariably when doing so, I am brought to competitor’s sites and am assaulted by their tees which typically make me feel like my grandmother just told me the dirtiest joke ever crafted. Of course, they actually have tee shirts for sale on their tee shirts sites, which could be considered a competitive advantage.

Anyway, among those clever, original shirts I will always find one addressing the difference between girls who spit and those who swallow.  For example:  “A sucker is born every minute.  Swallowers are hard to find.”  Kinda funny, a clever spin on the old sucker adage, but it made me think which is always a dangerous thing.  Do guys out there really care what a woman does with his sperm after it is propelled forcibly from them.  I would think the stuff leading up to that is way more important.  Speaking for myself, I wouldn’t care if she spit it into a handsome container on her desk and used it to seal envelopes for the next month.  I would most certainly be asleep by then.  Maybe I’m missing something.  Let me know.

While I’m on the subject, I thought I would take this opportunity to share my views on anal sex.  Here goes, if a woman outright offers or is open to that kind of experimentation that is all well and good.  If, as a man, you are constantly hounding your wife or girlfriend or hunting dog to give it up, then (sit down) you are most likely gay.  There is nothing wrong with that, but you should probably leave her alone and head down to the closest highway rest area.  Or get yourself arrested and sentenced to five years of bliss.

Despite the fact that these are my views and I believe them to be true, I will still probably sell my own version of the spit vs. swallow tee shirt.

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