Soupy’s Stimulus Plan

Okay, believe it or not I actually do try to shy away from political posts much of the time. But the fact of the matter is I listen to talk radio in my car and in my office (approximately 11 hours a day). And well, if that’s all you listen to…

I’ve heard all about the House’s stimulus bill, and the version the Senate is working on. I’ve heard Rush Limbaugh’s idea, but none of them really put money in the hands of the people. All of them simply define how the government will spend our tax dollars. And I don’t care what party you are, do you really still trust them to do that right?

I’m not an economist (No, really?), but the answer really is pretty simple. Ready?

It’s fairly self explanatory. Log onto the site, and print as much money as you want, whenever you want. What does it matter? We’ve abandoned the Gold Standard decades ago. China won’t buy any more Treasury Bills, so I guess we’ve abandoned the Debt Standard as well. So the money you print at home is backed by the same thing as the currency currently in circulation. The only value it has is what it cost in paper and ink to print. So we might as well jump on the Printer Cartridge Standard. Remember, it costs just as much to print a $1 bill as a $100, so don’t waste too much time printing singles (unless you’re going to a strip club, but even then why not print sheets of $100′s and really make it rain in there).

I am not insensitive to the Environmentalists’ concerns that this plan will cause a run on paper and the senseless deaths of millions of trees. Instead of printing actual cash, you can print a check and just fill in the amount. Or print the new Obama Trillion Dollar Bill. It’s up to you.

I know this plan does not stand a chance of getting through the Beltway Bureaucracy (not enough pork), but seriously what makes money I print at home any more counterfeit than the shit the┬áTreasury is printing? Sure it’s going to hurl us toward inflation (so does their plan), but who cares, just print more money.

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2 Responses to “Soupy’s Stimulus Plan”

  1. Just a couple more thoughts that I couldn’t figure out where to place in the post. This plan effectively ends Identity Theft, Homelessness (and with all these new home buyers and unlimited funds, imagine how high property values will go). Concerns over Healthcare would be assuaged, and I believe even the divorce rate would drop significantly. I guess it’s actually a pretty good plan after all.

  2. What they have spent so far has gone to the most unproductive parts of the economy and managed in the most unproductive way possible and the rest they just gave away.