Archive | May, 2010
R.I.P. Dennis Hopper

R.I.P. Dennis Hopper

Hollywood legend, Dennis Hopper died today in his Venice, California home. This couldn’t have happened at a worse time for me, as I am still mourning the fact that I will never get to see Bruce Willis and Gary Coleman star in What’chu Talkin’ ’bout Willis? the buddy cop film I wrote the screenplay for, which Kevin [...]

Read more
Nice Bazooka

Nice Bazooka

Don’t ask, don’t tell, don’t wince or complain that it hurts, don’t cry, and above all don’t spit that out. Congress has moved closer to repealing the 17 year old policy of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell,” allowing gay and lesbian soldiers to act as gay and lesbionically as they want.  In a related story, the Senate will vote today to [...]

Read more
Bright Light!  Bright Light!

Bright Light! Bright Light!

“Jesus Christ, I just changed that bulb three weeks ago!” was my father’s reaction to the loud *POP* that greeted him when he flipped on the kitchen light switch. I was quickly dispatched to the basement to find a replacement. My selection was really quite simple considering there were nothing but 100 watt bulbs in [...]

Read more

No Dead Pigs Were Harmed In The Making Of These Videos

If I ever get into a medieval style battle with a dead pig, five pieces of cardboard wearing chain mail, a water-filled steel barrel, a raw chicken, four inches of rope, a stalk of bamboo, balsa wood bunnies, or any unarmed inanimate object, I totally hope I am armed with a Cold Steel Two-Handed Great [...]

Read more
Comment Challenge VIII

Comment Challenge VIII

 This post is a special VIDEO Comment Challenge.  The “artist” disabled comments on the video’s YouTube page, so I thought I would move it over here.  A little backstory on video’s star:  Noah Ross toiled as an intern for  The Opie and Anthony Show where he worked day and night on his song, Jewlia, which he eventually retitled Julia [...]

Read more
The Villanova Story

The Villanova Story

I remember the last time one of my parents hit me (looking back, it may have actually been both of them), and I was a lot older than you would probably think.  I don’t say that to criticize my mom and dad — no, I definitely had it coming.  It’s just that most people would [...]

Read more
Strike Three

Strike Three

  I have, with little exception, been a staunch supporter of the much maligned Philadelphia sports fan.  I’ve never been able to fathom how our “passion” could be so misunderstood by a national audience.  And I viewed every questionably derogatory comment out of Tim McCarver’s mouth as a slap in our collective face. But our character can only be as strong as those [...]

Read more
Comment Challenge VII

Comment Challenge VII

Ah, the beauty of ADD. Sometimes my thoughts are all over the place; other times I lock onto something like a retarded pitbull. More oil slick chicks: “I don’t care if she finishes all our chores, Cinderella does not go to that ball!” “… and my good friend behind me, Farmer Arthur H. Hoggett, will [...]

Read more
Comment Challenge VI

Comment Challenge VI

Here she is, our nation’s response to the growing oil slick in the Gulf.  Have fun. Keep in mind she protects our right to do shit like this. And she is also a Rear Admiral. I know, I know. Okay, I’ll start: Steven Spielberg showed up at the premiere of HBO’s The Pacific in full military regalia, [...]

Read more