Archive | February, 2009
Almost Famous

Almost Famous

I’ve just been having a lot of fun tooling around in my time machine, going back to my youth and taking some actual events and framing them in a more literary way. Well, I decided to go back to the summer of 1979. Well, one day of it anyway. Bill Hill was the type of [...]

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Candidate For The Douche Party

Candidate For The Douche Party

This time I’m absolutely positive of the year. 1985 — spring to be precise, and my high school, my class more accurately, was in the throes of a heated student council presidential/vice presidential election. Outwardly, I was unaffected by the whole dog-and-pony show, unmoved by the speeches echoing through the school’s faux marble hallways, and [...]

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En Fuego Con Las Mujeres

En Fuego Con Las Mujeres

SUBTITLE: On Fire With The Ladies Based on actual events. In fact, nothing has been changed, and no one has been protected. It was 1988 or ’89, I don’t remember which, but I know I was close to donning flannel shirts, baggy shorts, and socks with my sandals. But not yet. As it was, I [...]

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Baby Chicken

I was engaged in a game of Baby Chicken with my wife the other evening (no, not the one that involves a dozen eggs, feathers, and an empty paper towel tube. We were both fully clothed, thank you very much). I should mention that I’m not even sure she was aware we were playing, and [...]

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Removing The Plank From My Own Eye

It’s funny, everytime Sean Penn or Tim Robbins or some such actor or actress takes the opportunity of accepting an award to voice their political views, I start to shake involuntarily.  “What the hell is it about actors that they think they deserve to be heard on important matters,” I think to myself, “who the [...]

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Less Miserable

In the midst of this economic crisis, which our congress in their infinite wisdom seeks to exacerbate, I’ve heard talk of revolution. Pundits and those prone to “fear mongering” claim it will not be an homage to the American Revolution, but will more likely resemble the French one. I’m not a European historian, or a [...]

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What? The Oscars Are Tomorrow?

Count me among the people who really don’t care this year. The Academy has changed things up in reaction to last year’s ratings, which were an all-time low. Rumors are flying that the cast of High School Musical, Miley Cyrus, and Robert Pattinson will appear. The names of the presenters are not being revealed in [...]

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Conspiracy Theory Friday

Hold on to your hats and pull your socks up before I blow them off with these two doozies (sp?). Neither involve our government, unless you count the U.S. National Weather Service. And neither make mention of secret societies like the Illuminati or Skull & Bones, who were just incidentally sued for stealing the Apache [...]

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Knock Knock

Who’s there? Kige. Kige who? Kige Ramsey. For those of you who are new to TeeShirtSoup.com (broth, as I like to refer to you. Okay that was gay.) I cannot emphasize enough the importance of going all the way back to the beginning and reading all the posts. There’s only 137 or so, and some [...]

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You Say You Want A Revolution

Here’s Rick Santelli on CNBC this morning from the floor of the Chicago Exchange. Yea, I said CNBC.

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Soupy’s Soapbox

Betsy Ross lived at Arch Street and Second And her sewing was very, very fine General Washington came to see her To order a brand new flag Six white stripes and seven pretty red ones Thirteen stars on a field of blue It was the first flag our country ever floated Hooray for the red, [...]

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A Little Housekeeping

In an earlier post I pondered that age-old question: What ever happened to the youngest daughter on the show Family Matters? One day in season 4 she went upstairs and just never came back down. And no one ever mentioned her again. I know if one of my relatives went up to his room never [...]

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Happy Presidents’ Day

Just a light-hearted look at all the crazies who succeeded and failed in their attempts to assassinate the President of the United States. First, the winners: John Wilkes Booth (killed Abraham Lincoln) – Booth was a member of a prominent acting family and a popular actor of the day. He was also a Confederate sympathizer [...]

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Are You Checking Out My Package?

So, less than a week has passed, and I believe I’ve come up with a second equally viable stimulus package. What can I say, I’m a thinker. My plan is based on the following (3) assumptions: 1. Politicians, preachers, pimps, and pornographers are just different versions of the same guy. 2. Although there is some [...]

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Live Aid 3

Okay, raise your hand if you wish you were a little African baby all of a sudden. Just think, if Ms. Hayek had been around in 1985, we may never have been blessed with such songs as We Are The World, or Do They Know It’s Christmas Time? (and why were we rubbing Christmas in [...]

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